Learning and Researching: Farming Books that Inspire Me

I come from a family that loves research. In any given argument, I can guarantee you the dictionary was near always pulled out at some point. With a linguist for a father, a Scrabble champion for a mother, and five older siblings all ready to correct me at every opportunity, I picked up the Know-What-You're-Talking-About mantra. I plan forever in advance, read all that I can from different sources, and make list after list of what is needed and what I like. Yes, Pinterest is just about my favorite invention ever. Every once in a while when Birch and I are out shopping for needed supplies for whatever project, he'll say something like, "Are you sure we need that specifically?" It takes all my energy not to slap him upside the head with all the books, time, and effort I've used over the last several months planning for the project we're finally executing. I don't, though. Usually I just shoot a look of death and sigh that passive-aggressive sigh most men have come to fear and loathe.

So, it should come as no surprise that while Birch and I scheme and plan to exit our current life and enter into a dreamworld (to us) of buying farmland, raising heritage breed farm animals, building a sustainable house, and becoming self-sufficient, we are both soaking in just about everything related we can get our hands on. We talk to friends we've made here (farmers and ranchers) and vendors at the farmer's markets, read blogs written by farmers across the country, read magazines and articles dedicated to farming, and follow farm-related news. But most of all, we read books. As you can imagine, some are more helpful than others and some are more inspiring than others.

We borrow books from our local library then buy the ones we know we'll read again and again. Here is our list:

• Mini-Farming: Self-Sufficiency on a 1/4 acre by Brett L. Markham
• The Backyard Homestead edited by Carleen Madigan
• The Backyard Homestead Guide to Raising Farm Animals by Gail Damerow
• Barnyard in Your Backyard by Gail Damerow
• Small-Scale Livestock Farming by Carol Ekarius
• Making Your Small Farm Profitable by Ron Macher
• Starting & Running Your Own Small Farm by Sarah Beth Aubrey
• You Can Farm by Joel Salatin
• Storey's Guide (to anything)
• The Omnivore's Dilemma by Michael Pollan
• Small-Plot, High-Yield Gardening by Sal Gilbertie and Larry Sheehan
• The Small-Scale Poultry Flock by Harvey Ussery
• Basic Butchering of Livestock & Game by John J. Mettler
• Seed to Seed: Seed Saving and Growing Techniques for Vegetable Gardeners by Suzanne Ashworth
• Four-Season Harvest by Eliot Coleman
• The Heirloom Life Gardener by Jere and Emilee Gettle
• Plowing with Pigs and Other Creative, Low-Budget Homesteading Solutions by Oscar H. Will & Karen K. Will

There are SO many books out there begging to be soaked in and churned out into practice. We're still making our way through them and more continue to be written! It is so exciting to experience this life through others and I am so grateful that so many people are returning to the farming life, even those converting their yards into a place rich in animals and vegetation. I look at this shift not as a trend or "the hip thing to do" but a movement. Sure, there are people not as serious about the philosophy behind the change, but I believe that as more and more people start growing their own food, more appreciation and concern will surface and our world will be a better place for it.

Birch and I struggle with our current place in this movement: willing and dedicated, but honestly, scared. Right now, Birch has job security, a regular paycheck, and amazing health insurance. He also has debt that we must pay. Changing our lives will mean the end of all those things. It will be a sacrifice. However, it is a sacrifice we are willing to make. We are confident that the satisfaction of our new life as farm owners and workers will greatly outweigh the comfort we feel now. It will be a difficult change which is why we strive to go in knowing as much as we can.

We can't, however, research forever. At some point, we'll have to act. Find land, move, and start the rest of our lives. So now we wait for that When. It's coming but not yet and we'll need to learn a bit more patience and take advantage of our advantages while we can.

What do you aspire to be? How do you help yourself to become the person you long to be?

Spring Into Action

We're currently obsessed with the Aston/Long books. They are informative and beautiful and Keats loves learning all the different names.

We are, as of now, calmly ignoring the fact that we have been ill. I declare us healthy and ready to face the world like the incalculable blooms and leaves popping forth everywhere I look. The animals on the farm are giving birth, the sky has turned a purplish shade of grey, and the green on the pussy willow bushes pops like never before.

It is so refreshing to see the farm start again. It brings a gravity to the seasons that I don't feel when I'm away. The lambs coming just on time, the kids nearby coming after, the leaves on the willow trees pushing out past their buds, and the wild mint showing itself at last. The fields of the surrounding farms are freshly tilled and ready for seeding. Keats points out all of the different machines with impressive accuracy and knows what they're each doing and why. 

I've put in the fresh spring plantings in my parents' front garden and sowed seeds for summer. Next up is the back vegetable garden. We've got to put something new in the usual tomato planter and put the tomatoes in a different one to refresh the soil. Seeing as the tomatoes have always been in the same planter for as long as I can remember, this couldn't happen sooner. My parents have been good sports in letting me head up their garden this last year. It's good experience for me and with the flooding issues we've had at home, it's been the perfect gardening outlet while we get our own yard sorted. I spent most of my childhood weekends with my dad digging in the dirt so this continuation years later is fitting.

Birch has planted some radishes and other random seeds in random spots around the house "just to get something in the ground." Can you tell we have different project styles? I have to give it to him, he gets it done. I really am grateful for that. I overthink just about everything and Birch reminds me, gently, that sometimes it's just better to have completed a project than to have done it to our ideal standard. That is a hard lesson for me.

I've admitted to myself that I am a perfectionist. I have a pretty heavy fear of failure and so I obsess over a project so much that sometimes I never finish it purely because it's not coming together exactly as I envisioned. I never once submitted a philosophy paper in college for this very reason. Looking back I can see how ridiculous that is. I was terrified by the critique, but come on! It was a PHILOSOPHY paper. That critique was the point! In fact, even earlier in school I had this issue. I think my parents assume I just never did my homework. I never told them I just refused to submit it. The work that was genuinely difficult for me, I was too scared to ask for help. It didn't even occur to me that I might have a learning disability until college. Then, when I explained how I felt and thought about learning math and learning languages, my special education teacher of a husband just nodded and said, "Yeah, that's a learning disability." Oh, great. The point is: I could have had help when I was younger, but I was too afraid of failure. I was too afraid of not being smart! The truth is, struggling doesn't mean you are not smart. It doesn't mean you're worthless. It shouldn't be embarrassing. I could have asked for help, I could have been placed in a special education math class, I could have asked for intensive tutoring. There were things all of the adults in my life could have done differently, sure, but when it comes down to it, it was my failure to accept failure that led to my academic downfall. I just let myself get horrific grades and accepted the storm at home when that report card dropped in the mailbox. That attitude has permeated other parts of my life as well.

I didn't understand it then, but I do now. It's okay to not understand things, to have to work hard, to not be inherently gifted at what you're doing. The success you accomplish on completion is far more powerful than the success of a natural talent. I hope I can work through this enough to teach my children that trying is better than succeeding, enjoyment is better than easy, and most of what we really pine for in life takes hard work, focus, practice, and passion.

So while I plan out flood-proof planters for our vegetables and veggie/herb planters for the chickens and ducks to munch, Birch is busy checking his seedlings in the yard and pulling weeds when he finds them. Together we make a fairly effective team. We'll figure it out. We have time.   

For now, I want to enjoy spring and practice my new life as a non-perfectionist. I'm not even going to look up the appropriate word for that.

Sorting and Wearing

Clothes breed, don't they? I swear I've gone through my clothes every time we've moved. Each time I've saved certain pieces attaching some sort of sentimental feeling to them or just hoping I'd fit in them again. Yeah... So now we're in this house and Birch and I are feeling the spirit of renewal and purge. New Year resolutions abound and I am not the only offender when it comes to clothes hoarding. I cannot tell you how many shirts Birch has with holes and/or unspeakable stains. I mean, he's had most of them since middle school. MIDDLE SCHOOL. I'll remind you, he's 32. Yeah. So while I reassemble Birch's wardrobe with appropriate wear, I'm shredding unthinkably ridiculous shirts and things for a rag rug and cutting up squares of the nicer prints for a quilt. The rest... well, I don't really know what to do with the rest. The whole point of these clothes is that they are not fit to be worn so I don't want to drop them at Goodwill or anything.

My personal resolution for myself is that any new clothes I purchase must fit these requisites:

• It fits me NOW.
• It makes me feel BEAUTIFUL and FIT.
• It goes with clothes I already OWN.
• It is HIGH QUALITY and will last over a years' worth of wear without warping or fading.

Very simply, I haven't made it a priority in my life to primp everyday, but I've begun to feel like I'm letting go a bit hence the rules above. No more clothes that fit poorly, no more that shrink or warp with one washing, and no more struggling to find something to wear out. I don't want to just be buying things all the time. I want each purchase to be calculated, budgeted, and thought out.

There is also the issue that my life is somewhat erratic when it comes to clothing needs. This is true of us all, right? So our closets have to accommodate different needs and occasions. Mine vary thusly:

• Clothes able to be covered in chicken nastiness.
• Clothes for date nights and parties.
• Comfort clothes for sick days.

My most recent purchases since this resolution have been mostly from Anthropologie, but I'm looking to Etsy and its many sellers creating handmade items from organic, fair trade cotton, etc. Leggings, especially. I swear I've died and gone to heaven looking through the various shops for leggings. I swoon just thinking about it.

Fox print leggings by Supayana; image courtesy of seller

Spirit Bear Print leggings in black by prettypennydesigns, image courtesy of seller

The Bees Knees leggings by blackbirdtees; image courtesy of seller

As you can see, I have an affectionate love affair with Color and Pattern. They are jealous of each other at times, but when the three of us get together all at once it's just steamy and fantastic.

The last step of sorting is storing! I have a few ideas floating around and a Pinterest board I'm slightly ashamed to call my own. With literally nothing to show for all the planning in my head, Spring isn't going to pass by without this project cementing itself on the checked-off list. That is paramount.

Love to you all. What are your favorite pieces of clothing? What do you have your eye on?

Falling Behind

It was inevitable. I'm officially behind on all of my resolutions. Wahhh.

Our little family has been playing tag-you're it with fevers, colds, the full-on flu, teething, and zero sleep for about a month. I was keeping it together for a while there, but I have been struck down by the Yuck and so I sit on the couch, wrapped in a down comforter, in front of the heater while Birch (taking a sick day off) takes the recovering but fussy children out and about the farm before it rains again. I made a horrible breakfast mistake involving cheese and Crystal hot sauce and now my belly is rolling around laughing on the floor. I'm telling you, the things it has said to me this morning would astonish you.

I started decorating March's mantle last night but it just doesn't feel right. It needs more potted plants, I think. Maybe twinkle lights to add a bit of brightness to all the gloomy, rainy days ahead. And a garland. Definitely. Also, I have a lot of rabbit-related decor.

As you might imagine, Date Night has been pretty much obliterated. We've declared a few nights as stay-at-home date nights complete with delicious, extravagant meals, but any other effort has been nonexistent. It's all right. We've been doing better. We had a run-in at the lumber yard recently that made us both think. There are certain areas where Birch and I just do things differently and we've come to realize that when discussing projects we both have to put extra effort into saying our ideas nicely and staying friendly throughout the process. It feels fake still, but I'm confident that it will start coming naturally and feelings will be spared (while still getting the project done and looking lovely).

I still haven't finished ridding ourselves of books galore we don't need/read and I'm at a complete stand still on the clothes purging. We have, however, built a new chicken run that will actually keep the chickens in. (There were about five or six that consistently flew out to explore and demolish the neighbors' plants. Always the same hens, too.) With our neighbors' invaluable help, the run is now taller, slightly bigger, and easier to upgrade later. I'm still mourning the loss of our first chicken coop but what are you gonna do? Additions in the coming months will include a decorative top edge, a coat of whitewash on the inside of the coop, an upcycled window door, an indoor dust bathing box, and another set of nesting boxes.

With Keats' third birthday and party coming up next month, we are gearing up for the Great Switch. Keats and Frida will have the big bedroom while Birch and I go into the smaller room. All we really need is a bed and the closet but we'd like the kids' room to have tons more space for playing and storage. The Switch is necessary. I'm hoping to finally build a lofted bed for Keats over a playhouse and a small/medium-sized play table for their trains (with built-in storage). Keeping it simple is key.

I borrowed a lovely book from the library and I'm a few chapters in now. I'm really enjoying it and highly recommend it. When I finish, I'll do a full blown review here, but for now, if it looks interesting and useful to you, I can say that it is motivating, sympathetic, and useful.

With all that, this is the (hopefully) final month of flood season. If the house makes it through, I'll feel much more secure in all the effort I want to put into making this house our home.

I hope you and yours are healthy and well. What have you been working on lately?

Happy Birthday Miriam!

You're my girl. Best friends since we were thirteen. Basically, right before it all got real. Haha. We made it, though, and I'm so happy to say that it was in large part because of our friendship. You are constant, compassionate, beautiful, loving, hilarious, wild, creative, direct. You have the best laugh I've ever heard. I love you more than ever. Keep being you and I'll keep being me. Friends forever, my love.

 

 

 

p.s. I cannot wait to see what idiotic pictures we have of ourselves together when we're 93. Love you.

Have Yourself a Merry Little Valentine's Day

One word frees us of all the weight and pain of life:
That word is love.
- Sophocles

Valentine's Day has all kinds of cans hanging off the end of it: expectations, frustrations, loneliness, memories, new relationships, old relationships, sex, self-loathing, self-love, giving, gratitude, family, friends, and animals. We go out or stay in. And EVERYONE has something to say on the subject. Some people love the holiday. Some people love the idea of the holiday. Some people are upset they don't have someone special to share it with. Some people gleefully enjoy the "We're Single" romp out and about. Some people eat way too much ice cream while watching "Eulogy." (Look it up, it's fantastic.) Some people spends days and weeks preparing for their kids' Valentine's Day parties at school. Some people cut out paper hearts and set out dishes of heart-shaped chocolates and conversation hearts. Some people decorate the whole house. Some people write new songs commemorating break ups or glorifying love. Some people go all out and spend insane amounts of money on each other. Some people simply exchange notes. Some people start relationships, some commit to relationships, some end relationships. Every year we are inundated with how other people feel about a holiday some describe as a "Hallmark Holiday." So, I'll add to the flood.

Valentine's Day is a set day when all of us can come out of our emotional closets and say "I love you" to whomever we please. Sure, we should say it every day, we should say it, write it, sing it, show it every day. But most of us don't. For whatever reason we just don't. Having a specific day is good. Sure, just like any holiday, we can drown ourselves in expectations. It's easy to do. I do it nearly every year with every holiday, especially now that I have kids. Trying to create memories and traditions for them is a daunting task. Add to that the pressure of enlivening my relationship with my husband and the insanity that is Panic Disorder and you could have the perfect storm. BUT, starting with last Christmas, I'm doing pretty well at keeping my expectations in order, keeping the budget down (or at least just reasonable), and making myself feel that I've done enough. Having a specific day to say "I love you" takes me out of my usual reflexive "I love you"s and gives me a deadline to make sure it is special. It gives me time to reflect on WHY I love who and what I do. It gives me a medium to express it. It gives me an opportunity to teach my children about the importance of love and showing love. My conversations with Keats about Valentine's Day have been my favorite so far. Christmas was fun (he was obsessed) but I feel like Valentine's Day is a holiday that truly anyone can celebrate without thinking twice (and yes, I know it's based on several saints, etc.). It is purely about love, gratitude, and charity. Even historically. It hasn't been so fully switched about as other major holidays.

Admittedly, I get a little confused when people demand they hate Valentine's Day. Really? You hate expressing love? Sure, sometimes the day falls a bit too close to raw feelings, but there is always someone to say "I love you" to. (And yes, I have a sentences ending in prepositions problem.) To me, it's important to remember that Valentine's Day didn't start off celebrating romantic love. That started around Geoffrey Chaucer's time (about eleven centuries after the first Valentinus was imprisoned and executed). Before I was settled and happy within my romantic sphere, Valentine's Day was always a bit rough. I not-so-quickly learned that I needed to move my attentions to others: friends, family, strangers and myself. Love is universal, all-encompassing, sweeping, and well, lovely. It can be as simple as a smile on the street and as extravagant as a world tour. I love Valentine's Day. It's my favorite holiday. Busy lives and horrendous events be damned. At the end of the day, I will remember love. In the night, I'll dream of love. And when it's all over for me (hopefully in very, very many years) I hope I'll be remembered in love.

Happy Valentine's Day!

The Year in Chores

This is one of those lists that I am, at the outset, positive will be rearranged and completed as we can. In between, there will be other to-do's like preparing for parties, coop chores, and hopefully getting more done than we'd planned. But here it is, in its near entirety. I'm positive things have been forgotten or will merely be added as we come to them. Also, I know: this is daunting. This is a lot. This is too much, really. And that is fine! I'm not so stuck on some of the items, but I wanted to get them down so I wouldn't forget. I also find it helps to have the full picture so I get what I can done in a way that won't be completely disrupted when the later projects are finished through.
  
January/February
Entry:

• organize books (purge)
• build driftwood bench with hairpin legs (find reasonably priced legs online)
• create a reception station (boot & shoe area, place to put down bags, garbage can, shredder, mail sorter, key rack, coats hung up, hat rack)
• buy large all-weather mat for the space from the dining room to front door

Bedroom:

• new bed frame (iron from americanironbeds.com)
• buy extra bedding
• take doors off closet
• purge clothes
• organize clothes by function (for birch) and color (for me)
• take out boxes to the garage
• create a space for desk and a wall filing system (for dealing with bills, etc)

Nursery corner:

• set up crib
• sew flannel bedding for crib
• put up decorations

March/April
Laundry area:

• more plants (ferns, etc) in the window
• put up a line for drying some things
• build shelves in the cabinet for detergent
• keep counter above washer and dryer CLEAR for folding

Dining room:

• clear up cold breakfast station
• clear up hot drink station (with added coffee supplies from kitchen)
• create recycling area
• clear off buffet table
• organize dishes
• buy serving dishes once a month until we have what we need
• buy dining chairs (at least four)
• buy booster seat

Kids' room:

• take doors off closet
• hang up clothes (by function for keats, by color for frida)
• new bed for keats (smaller, lofted?)
• buy bins and organize toys
• buy another bookcase

May/JuneLiving room:

• replace and paint windowsill
• paint fireplace white
• create photo wall
• paint remaining walls
• put up artwork and photo frames
• more light (!) especially over the mantle

Front garden and porch:

• rake/sweep
• build raised bed around perimeter
• plan garden
• put up birdhouses

July/August
Kitchen:

• put up shelving for cookbooks (purge some we never use)
• oil drawers so they pull out and push in smoothly
• small shelf or rack for frequently used items right above the butcher block (to clear space for chopping, etc)
• shelf above counter for smaller bulk item jars
• move coffee making supplies to a special station in dining room
• move toaster to the counter
• clean out fridge and put down liner for easier clean-up
• sort drawers and label
• herb garden in the window
• purge glasses (so many means infrequent dish-washing and dishes piling up)
• buy new teapot (le creuset)
• put up shelf for pots OR get more hooks for the pot rack
• put up the three-tier basket for heavier vegetables and fruit

September/OctoberBathroom: 

• paint walls
• buy/make new shower curtain
• buy new shower curtain pole/holder
• organize diaper changing station
• purge all old/expired products and medicine & REPLACE what is needed (medicine, especially)

November/DecemberBack garden: 

• build duck enclosure
• buy and put up aviary netting to keep out hawks and little birds
• build raised beds for vegetable gardening
• secure shed and paint
• put up garden art

Garage:

• put up shelving for boxes (at least three feet off the ground)
• organize tools on pegboard
• clean out chick brooding box
• sweep